出国留学网

目录

2014托福考试之优秀写作技巧

字典 |

2014-03-07 15:42

|

【 liuxue86.com - 托福作文 】

  考官评分时要阅看那么多的文章,什么样的文章才能得到高分?除了基本的卷面整洁外,还要几个关键点。

  1.统一性

  一个段落内的各个句子必须从属于一个中心,任何游离于中心思想之外的句子都是不可取的。请看下例:

  Joe and I decided to take the long trip we‘d always wanted across the country. We were like young kids buying our camper and stocking it with all the necessities of life. Bella bakes the best rhubarb pie. We started out in early spring from Minneapolis and headed west across the northern part of the country. We both enjoyed those people we met at the trailer park. Joe received a watch at his retirement dinner. To our surprise, we found that we liked the warm southern regions very much, and so we decided to stay here in New Mexico。

  本段的主题句是段首句,controlling idea(中心思想)是take the long trip across the country。文中出现两个irrelevant sentences,一个是Bella bakes the best rhubarb pie,这一段是讲的是Joe and I ,中间出现一个Bella是不合适的。

  还有,Joe received a watch at his retirement dinner这一句更是与主题句不相关。考生在四级统考的作文卷上常常因为造出irrelevant sentences(不相关语句)而丢分,值得引起注意。再看一个例子:

  My name is Roseanna, and I like to keep physically fit. I used to weigh two hundred pounds, but I joined the YMCA for an exercise class and diet program. In one year I lost eighty pounds. I feel much better and never want to have that much weight on my five-feet frame again. I bought two new suitcases last week. Everyday I practice jogging three miles, swimming fifteen laps, lifting twenty-pound weights and playing tennis for one hour. My mother was a premature baby。

  本段的controlling idea 是like to deep physically fit,但段中有两个irrelevant sentences,一个是I bought two new suitcases last week,另一个是My mother was a premature baby。

  从上面两个例子可以看出,native speakers同样会造出来irrelevant sentences。卷面上如果这种句子多了,造成偏题或离题,那问题就更严重了。

  2.完整性

  正象我们前面说得那样,一个段落的主题思想靠推展句来实现,如果只有主题句而没有推展句来进一步交待和充实,就不能构成一个完整的段落。同样,虽然有推展句,但主题思想没有得到相对圆满的交待,给读者一种意犹未尽的感觉。这样的段落也不能完成其交际功能。例如:

  Physical work can be a useful form of therapy for a mind in turmoil. Work concentrates your thoughts on a concrete task. Besides, it is more useful to workyou produce something rather than more anxiety or depression。

  本段的主题句是段首句。本段的两个推展句均不能回答主题句中提出的问题。什么是 "a mind in turmoil"(心境不平静)Physical work又如何能改变这种情况?为什么它能起therapy的作用?读者得不到明确的答案。

  由于四级统考的作文部分只要求写一篇100~120个词的三段式短文,每一段只有大约40个词左右,因此,要达到完整就必须尽可能地简明。例如:

  It is not always true that a good picture is worth a thousand words. Often writing is much clearer than a picture. It is sometimes difficult to figure out what a picture means, but a careful writer can almost always explain it。

  段首句所表达的主题思想是一种看法,必须有具体事例加以验证。上述两个推展句只是在文字上对主题作些解释,整个段落内容空洞,简而不明。如果用一两个具体的例子的话,就可以把主题解释清楚了。比如下段:

  It is not always true that a picture is worth a thousand words. Sometimes, pictures are pretty useless things. If you can‘t swim and fall in the river and start gulping water, will you be better off to hold up a picture of yourself drowning, or start screaming "Help"?

  3.连贯性(coherence)

  连贯性包括意连和形连两个方面,前者指的是内在的逻辑性,后者指的是使用转换词语。当然这两者常常是不可分割的。只有形连而没有意连,句子之间就没有内在的有机的联系;反之,只有意连而没有形连,有时行文就不够流畅。

  1) 意连

  段落中句子的排列应遵循一定的次序,不能想到什么就写什么。如果在下笔之前没有构思,边写边想,写写停停,那就写不出一气呵成的好文章来。下面介绍几种常见的排列方式。

  A。按时间先后排列(chronological arrangement)

  We had a number of close calls that day. When we rose, it was obviously late and we had to hurry so as not to miss breakfast; we knew the dining room staff was strict about closing at nine o‘clock. Then, when we had been driving in the desert for nearly two hours - it must have been close to noonthe heat nearly hid us in; the radiator boiled over and we had to use most of our drinking water to cool it down. By the time we reached the mountain, it was four o‘clock and we were exhausted. Here, judgement ran out of us and we started the tough climb to the summit, not realizing that darkness came suddenly in the desert. Sure enough, by six we were struggling and Andrew very nearly went down a steep cliff, dragging Mohammed and me along with him. By nine, when the wind howled across the flat ledge of the summit, we knew as we shivered together for warmth that it had not been our lucky day。

  本段从 "rose"(起床)写起,然后是吃早餐("not to miss breakfast", "closing at nine o‘clock"),然后是 "close to noon",一直写到这一天结束("By nine")。

  B. 按位置远近排列(spatial arrangement)。例如:

  From a distance, it looked like a skinny tube, but as we got closer, we could see it flesh out before our eyes. It was tubular, all right, but fatter than we could see from far away. Furthermore, we were also astonished to notice that the building was really in two parts: a pagoda sitting on top of a tubular one-story structure. Standing ten feet away, we could marvel at how much of the pagoda was made up of glass windows. Almost everything under the wonderful Chinese roof was made of glass, unlike the tube that it was sitting on, which only had four. Inside, the tube was gloomy, because of the lack of light. Then a steep, narrow staircase took us up inside the pagoda and the light changed dramatically. All those windows let in a flood of sunshine and we could see out for miles across the flat land。

  想了解更多托福作文网的资讯,请访问: 托福作文

本文来源:https://toefl.liuxue86.com/t/1941528.html
延伸阅读
托福写作对于字数的要求,不知道同学们有没有了解呢?下面就和出国留学网的小编来看看全面了解2020年托福考试作文考试有哪些新规定?一、新托福写作文章字数要求根据对ETS最新的评分标准
2020-07-17
对于托福考试来说,很多同学对于托福写作面临的困境是比较多的,那么接下来就和出国留学网来看看托福写作考试要克服哪些困境?写作困境备考托福的考生通常都会面临托福写作的3个困境;困境1:
2020-07-06
托福独立写作对于同学们来说,是比较重要的,也是比较困难的,接下来就和出国留学网一起来看看2020年托福独立写作备考细节一览表。备考须知开头段交代清楚就行,不要一味求长还记得学英语的
2020-06-16
作文是考试的重中之重,英文作文总是语法错误怎么办呢?想必是不少出国人士比较关心的问题,和出国留学网一起来看看托福写作考试要避免哪些语法错误?1."amountsof&qu
2020-06-06
托福独立写作对于很多同学来说开头和结尾段是很难写的,为了帮助大家,出国留学网的小编整理了这方面的模板,希望能帮到大家,那么下面就来看看2020年托福独立写作高分模板。托福独立写作开
2020-05-26
托福写作速度慢对于托福写作考试来说是一个致命的缺点,对于不能进行完整写作的同学,肯定知道托福的分数不会高,那么接下来就和出国留学网一起来看看怎样提高托福考试写作速度?速度提升其实对
2020-03-31
对于很多正在备考托福的同学们,托福的写作能力现在怎么样呢?下面就和出国留学网的小编来看看怎样提高托福考试写作能力?来一起了解一下吧。技能提升一要有一定的英语语法基础新托福写作对于语
2020-05-26
托福写作速度慢对于托福写作考试来说是一个致命的缺点,对于不能进行完整写作的同学,肯定知道托福的分数不会高,那么接下来就和出国留学网一起来看看怎样提升托福考试写作的速度?其实对于托福
2019-09-27
托福独立写作对于同学们来说,是比较重要的,也是比较困难的,接下来就和出国留学网一起来看看托福考试独立写作高分细节一览表。细节一:开头段交代清楚就行,不要一味求长还记得学英语的时候,
2019-12-20
作文是考试的重中之重,那么写好一篇作文的技巧有哪些呢?想必是不少出国人士比较关心的问题,和出国留学网一起来看看新托福写作考试技巧盘点。1.指令一出来就立刻跳过。你对指令应该已很熟悉
2019-06-07